Meet the Coach
Hi, I'm Hayley.
I'm looking forward to getting to know you 😊
As a coach and founder of Quiet Connections, I'm passionate about using my professional skills and my personal journey from socially anxious to quietly confident to start conversations, raise awareness and help others who feel anxious, broken and alone, just like I did.
I’m a highly sensitive introvert, living between Truro and Redruth in Cornwall, UK. I am a Coach also studying a Masters in Positive Psychology and Coaching Psychology with the University of East London, and Founder of Quiet Connections where I coach, run courses, co-host a podcast and speak in public! But it wasn't always this way... I grew up in Falmouth a very shy child and became extremely socially anxious and avoidant. I was too afraid to go to university or get a job after college; I struggled to make friends and didn't believe I would ever have a relationship. Being seen was my biggest fear. I expected to be judged harshly, criticised and rejected, so I kept myself small and hidden in all aspects of my life. It didn't feel safe to speak up and be seen, and I would freeze up if I tried to. I felt like I was defective and didn't fit in and I couldn't see a future, which led to me attempting suicide aged 19. But I still didn't get the help that I needed.
Over the years, I picked up puzzle pieces which helped me understand that I really wasn't broken or defective, and I could change how I show up in the world. I learnt strategies to manage the anxious feelings, started to see my strengths and value, and I grew to love my quieter nature.
I've done things I never thought possible including dancing on the streets for charity, completing a degree (and now returning to university as a postgraduate student), holding down jobs, taking public transport and navigating big cities alone, presenting and publicly speaking to 100s of people, becoming a Marine Mammal Medic and, of course, setting up and leading a business!
In 2014, I trained to become a Coach and the little acorn of an idea I had for Quiet Connections eventually came to life as a social enterprise... with a little help from Unlocking Potential and the School for Social Entrepreneurs where I was fortunate to meet my business partner, Stacie. Setting up a business as a quieter person brought it's own challenges too and it took a while for me to fully believe that I didn't have to be chatty and extraverted to succeed!
When I'm not coaching and studying, I spend my time with my sister, niece and nephews; walking in nature; DIY-ing my home, being pet-mum to my once-socially-anxious cat and dog, Little Bug and Robin; taking swimming lessons or dancing like nobody's watching in the kitchen!
- Student of MSc Applied Positive Psychology and Coaching Psychology
- NLP Practitioner (neuro-linguistic programming)
- mBIT Coach (multiple brain integration techniques - think head, heart & gut wisdom)
- Blue Health Coach (the science and philosophy of water for wellbeing)
- ASIST: Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training
- Action Learning Team Facilitator
- ILM Level 3 Award in Coaching
- BSc Dimensions in Healthcare
- Business Studies (140 credits level 4-6)
- Association of NLP (ANLP) Professional Member
- Code of Practice: ANLP, mBIT & EMCC
What my coaching clients are saying...
Laura, St Agnes
Since joining Quiet Connections, I have started volunteering in a place I had no prior experience of and gained employment. What’s most surprised me is being able to going to a party, dancing, socialising with new people and feeling very comfortable with the whole event… actually enjoying it!
I have more confidence and I am becoming more myself. I now have self-compassion and more understanding of my quietness and my past reactions. I see I am becoming more responsible for opening up new opportunities in my life, I am becoming increasingly stronger to experience more for myself and family.
Quiet connections has rebalanced my life with their kindness, knowledge and fantastic support. Working with Quiet Connections is the best thing I’ve done!
“Before starting coaching, I was struggling with self-confidence, ‘selling’ myself in job applications and interviews, understanding the setting of limits and how to break the cycle and start saying ‘no’. I was bit apprehensive about the coaching process and the discussions, but that eased almost immediately with how the first coaching session was conducted. It still felt challenging, but it a good and necessary way. I have been given the courage to look at roles I never would have thought about beforehand and frame my writing about myself in a very different way.
As a result of our work together, I have (1) applied for a role at a company other than my current one! I have started to think for a moment before responding to any praise or positive feedback, to not sound disbelieving. And I can push back on some work requests now, I know it's okay to say no when something isn't your job and you don't have time.
Hayley has been great - flexible, getting me to question why I am making assumptions and what different scenarios would look like. Helping me to learn to pause and think. Ensuring that I don't just continue on the same road that I have been, but offering me the opportunity to think differently and challenge my preconceptions about myself and the rules I have put in place.”
“My sessions with Hayley have enabled me to become more motivated & given me the ability to move forward in my life with more confidence. Hayley's professional, personal approach has given me a greater understanding & insights into my behaviour & anxieties around certain situations & relationships. I now feel more confident & self-accepting.
Due to the current climate (covid) I have been unable to meet with Hayley face to face. Whilst I initially thought that this service may not have been useful for this reason. I was pleasantly surprised that the autonomy actually allowed me to be more vulnerable & this actually catapulted my progress. I have been involved in many different types of healing/support work/therapies over the years, including counselling when training to be a therapist myself, but I can honestly say, that the work I have done with Hayley has been the most successful & rewarding in my personal growth. Such a great service, I have already recommended Quiet Connections to other people. Thank you so much Hayley for all your support, vulnerability & transparency.”
“When I came to Quiet Connections I had limited confidence and no self-esteem or self-belief. I didn't feel worthy of others’ time, effort, help or love. But with coaching, I began to feel differently about myself. I discovered I could do the things I was scared of, and I was likeable. I joined groups and did different activities and had fun while being my true self... Happy Dance and all! The biggest thing I've learned is to trust, both myself and others. I have belief in myself now. I can act with grace and love to myself as well as those around me and I have been able to develop friendships with new people.”
My coaching sessions with Quiet Connections have been amazing. I have come so far since I started with my coach. She has firstly helped me to identify & understand what was causing me stress & anxiety in the first place as I didn’t really know. We then explored those things and developed tools to help me cope better. The biggest thing I’ve got back is my motivation and this is honestly changing my life! What works with Quiet Connections is that it’s tailored exactly to you as an individual, I tried counselling before and it tends to be too general, one size fits all! I couldn’t recommend my Coach highly enough, she has helped me change my outlook on life so much for the better.
Hannah, East Midlands
Being in touch with you already feels life changing. I feel better about who I am and more proud of myself as a quieter person. I have become more accepting of any struggles I have. I am actually surprised how many wins I have had since the programme started. The surprising thing is that I didn't necessarily plan a lot of these as a comfort stretch, but I seem to be pushing myself to do new things anyway.
I would like to thank QC so much for such an amazing course, and especially my assigned coach, Hayley, for being a really great support and always willing to give her time. I feel that I have learnt a lot and have grown a lot as a result of the programme and most importantly, I know that I am not alone and am looking forward to continuing as a member of the quiet community!
“Since having coaching, I've been feeling a lot better and I've gone out and met a group of new people multiple times for the first time in 3 years. I even talked to people when I was there which is amazing! None of the calming techniques that have been shown to me before have worked but Hayley found one that did straight away! I finally feel like I can get back on my feet and get better. I also think that it helped that it was a phone call instead of face to face because I could be more honest and didn't have to worry about body language or eye contact so I could focus more. It really felt like Hayley was invested in me getting better and was dedicated to finding any solution to help. This has honestly been invaluable and I'm so thankful even though I was sceptical before starting.”
Esther, St Austell
"Working with Quiet Connections made me start to challenge my limiting beliefs and see that my thoughts are not my reality; they’re very powerful, but they don't define who I am. I realised that actually I'm not all these labels that I had said to me over the years and it's made me challenge how I saw myself and to stop rejecting myself.
I want people to know that there's hope. Just because you're used to thinking and behaving in a certain way, it doesn't mean that that is your destiny. And I would definitely recommend doing comfort zone stretches because there's no joy in being stuck. They say life begins at the end of it and it definitely true."
Garry Bastable, Somerset
"Before having coaching, I was struggling with anxiety. I was referred by Positive People and I thought it wouldn't of worked but I was wrong, it’s a brilliant service. I have noticed a change in myself. I'm going out more in to the public and I'm finding my mindset is a lot better since starting coaching. My anxiety has got to a level I can control and I've found the mindset has got a lot better. The work you do is amazing, thank you."
Thomas Uren, Redruth
“Before Quiet Connections, I had severe anxiety, depression, and panic disorder. I worked with both Hayley and Phil over the years and would highly recommend them to anyone in need of coaching. I have become a lot more calmer in myself and I am managing my stress and anxiety better. Also I have become more active in my day-to-day life. I just loved the Blue Health Coaching in or around the sea or cliffs and lakes etc. It really is a game changer and just being in and around nature is so helpful.”
I would really love to work with you if...
You're excited about discovering your unique qualities, gifts, passions and experiences and exploring how best to use these to express yourself more authentically and contribute to your world in a way that works with your quieter or more sensitive nature -whatever this looks like for you.
As your coach, I will be walking alongside you as a fellow explorer, knowing that you are the expert on you. My role is to assist you in your journey, exploring your map of the world together and navigating your opportunities and challenges, reflecting your strengths and resources back to you as you uncover new insights, make thoughtful and courageous choices, and take meaningful action on the path that’s aligned with who you truly are (learn more about coaching here).
The first step is to book an introductory call with me to make sure that we're a good match and coaching is right for you...
Book an introductory call with me
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